rambling

[miari]

I've always maintained that I don't have a favorite in TVXQ.  I thought for a little bit that it was Jaejoong, but the more I got into them, the more I realized that I just honestly do not have a favorite. I love each of them equally for their own, individual strengths. And weaknesses.

I think for me, that's why this is hitting so hard. Granted, I'm in a tough life period, adjusting to the real world after college, trying to balance life and fandom, working out my faith, etc., and having all this turmoil in something that was bringing me so much peace of mind is pretty much the suckiest thing ever.

I'm so happy for JCS because they're obviously pleased and it's something that they want to do, so yay for them, and the pieces of my heart that hold them are rejoicing. Th parts that hold Homin are breaking, however, because obviously Changmin's pissed as all hell, and, I don't blame him at all, and I'm sure Yunho's aching inside even though he was courteous.

Idk. You're all prolly like, well, duh. Obviously that's how we all feel, why are you just realizing it now?

Anyway.

Bottom line is, I'm happy, I'm sad, I really want them to sing together, but I want them to be happy with each other first. My needs are nothing and not important in comparison.  This isn't going to stop me from loving them or appreciating what they've accomplished. I'm still wearing my TVXQ sweatshirt with pride, I will still love the color red, I will continue to have this awesomeness as my wallpaper and I imagine that I won't be taking it down anytime soon, and I will still identify myself as an unofficial member of Cassiopeia.

And I refuse to stop hoping that I will hear the five of them sing together again. Soon.

So there.

On a side note, I figured out what the hell I was doing wrong with the css, and now I have my pretty header up and it looks beautiful.

Comments

[senseikk.livejournal.com]

Like you, I don't really have a favorite in dbsk. Yunho was my initial bias, but in the end, I fell for all 5 of them. And I fell hard. It hurts to see them divided into these two groups right now, but because I love each individual so freakin' much, I doesn't matter to me anymore. I'm mature enough to not be stubborn and demand things to go a certain way just for my selfish fangirl fantasies. If they're better off like this, let it be. If they're happy I'm happy.

I think my acceptance of the situation has to do with my trust in them. I love them, and I trust that they know what they are doing. No matter how much they maybe divided now, there is no doubt in my mind that there was once love between them. Even if momentarily, it was beautiful.

So yea in summary I'm bummed out. However, I'm hopeful b/c this isn't the end. I'm always keeping the faith. It may be for their reunion and it may just be faith in them in general. Even though it has been a bittersweet ride, it's not stopping me from looking forward.

(sorry my own rant is in journal.. ^^"""" May we all feel better soon!)